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When All Else Fails, Fail

by Donna Maria

Failure is uncomfortable and embarrassing. But it is also empowering, if you allow it to be. For one thing, failure helps you empathize with others. This is good not only in personal relationships, but also in business ones. When you empathize with the failures and challenges of others, you are better equipped to enhance their lives with what you have to offer.

Failure also teaches you to ask for help. Whenever I try something and get nowhere, I reach out to friends or business colleagues who are already doing what I want to do. Sometimes I have to pay for their insights, sometimes it’s free. Either way, when faced with continually failing or improving my circumstances, asking for help becomes a no-brainer.

Fear of Failure Leads to Irrelevance

Many would-be small business owners have collected mountains of information necessary to successfully own and manage a business. They can tell me everything they need to do to make a go of it. And then they do nothing. Why? Because they are afraid they’ll miss something. They are terrified of making a mistake or doing something incorrectly.

Meanwhile, other people are pushing them out of the way.

They are being made irrelevant and they don’t even know it.

My Failures. And There Are Lots.

A few years back, I launched a magazine. I drastically underestimated the amount of resources it would take to create, edit, publish and circulate the publication. My goal was to publish quarterly. After three issues published over a two-year period, I admitted defeat. I’d had enough. I had failed. I refunded thousands of dollars to subscribers and sponsors. It was not pretty.

Today, I empathize with people who manage the magazine publication process. What’s more, I can help them by sharing how they can avoid some of the mistakes I made. My failure is made even more valuable because I am now equipped to try again if I want to, and do a better job the next time around.

The first time I quit my super-cool paying real corporate job, it was to open an aromatherapy shop. I had a blast tearing through thousands of dollars. I made soap, candles and aromatherapy products all day long, in between long herbal tea sessions with my customers on a cushy couch the landlord let me use for free. I had so much fun that I went broke.

When I went back to my old boss begging to have my old job back (or any job!), the first thing she said to me was, “Oh, I heard your business failed, so that’s why you’re back?” Fighting back tears, I explained that I did not consider it a failure, but a learning experience. But if she wanted to call it a failure, that was fine with me. She hired me back on the spot. Turns out the company was in a jam for people at that very moment. My failure worked for me and the company. Talk about timing.

I am sharing this with you because I am the real deal. If I can fail and keep on going, you can too. In fact, you’d better. Because when you’ve done all you can to make it happen, but it’s still not happening, possible failure in the face of a try is your only option.

When all else fails, fail. You’ll be glad you did.

Question: How have you turned failure into victory?

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posted on March 11, 2010 ·

Facebook comments:

  • SPass

    Too many to count! But as you mentioned, they are necessary for growth. I recently read somewhere that if you haven't failed at anything then you haven't stretched yourself. I tried my hand at catering – great food but didn't factor in all the costs and time and staff. Went on the corporate and then moved on to the world of entrepreneurship. I'd say there's a critical miss every quarter if you're trying to grow.

  • http://www.sterlingminerals.com/ Katherine@sterlingminerals

    Great article, but the big question is, when do you determine it is time to fail? What are the key elements in recognizing things aren't happening despite all of your efforts?

    I think this would be a great elaboration for on an already well written article.

    ~Just my 2 cents~

  • http://www.indiebusinessblog.com Donna Maria Coles Johnson

    Well now, that's a darn good question. Indeed, it's another post! For now, I'll say this. In a nutshell, you know it's time to quit when the costs outweigh the benefits. The costs can be financial of course. They can also take the form of physical taxing of your body or your mental resources. Or sometimes, it can be as simple as realizing that you made a mistake, and deciding to cut your losses. In “real life,” I think it's usually a combination of all of those things.

    Now, I shared my thoughts, but I bet yours are more interesting. How do you know when it's time to fail?

  • http://www.indiebusinessblog.com Donna Maria Coles Johnson

    A critical miss every quarter — that's a good way to think of it. And if that's the case, then I'm on target in spades!! LOL!

  • http://www.sterlingminerals.com/ Katherine@sterlingminerals

    ROFLOL! I read this and burst out laughing, thinking way to go dM turn it back on me! You currently can't go by my perceptions right now. I am having a mind numbing meltdown. Not because my business isn't working, but because regardless of successes in business, one can still question themselves, “is this all really worth it?”

    To say the least I would categorize my situation as a lack of mental resources currently. After the last two weeks with the CFSC, and Colorado bill and still staying on top of answering emails, Blogging, mixing formulations and speaking with customers on the phone (something I am still totally hands on and won't let anyone else touch it) and trying to be there in support of my fellow indies and stay an active participant with those that I feel close to in standing against the nay sayers (deep breath) and the rampant disinformation, participating in discussion, Linked In forums with more support for our side….well let's just say I am not a good one to ask at this moment.

    My article this week, I turned over to my customers since I literally was too tired to create something original. I am stopping to smell the roses so to speak, the rest of this week.

    That is my 1 cent, because this piggy bank is bust!

  • http://www.eastonsweb.com jeaston

    Wow Donna your post is a powerful testimony. I have been at the point you described MANY times and in reviewing the biographies of entrepreneurs I admire the stories are all the same.

    I learned in science that a test is never a failure even if it shows that it can't be done that way its still a success. It is good to know that you are “one of us”. Now, what can I test today?

  • http://www.indiebusinessblog.com Donna Maria Coles Johnson

    Love the “test” analogy. And once you fail, it's no scary anymore.

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